a few nights ago, my 5 month old son was having trouble sleeping, which in turn meant that our whole house was having trouble sleeping. it was my turn to get up, so i crawled out of bed and stumbled through the dark hallway into his room. after a few moments, i realized that all of the tricks i had acquired as a young father weren’t going to get him to fall back asleep. the only thing left to do was to pick him up from his crib and hold him on my shoulder, hoping he might calm down. over the next fifteen minutes or so i carried him around his room in what became a sort of waltz—an intimate and peaceful dance between father and son. as we swayed back and forth, a lyric in a song we’ve sung in church came to mind. it’s a lyric that is a beautiful portrayal of God’s love, but it’s one that i’ve sung without really being able to grasp the meaning of until that evening.

“you dance over me, while i am unaware. you sing all around and i haven’t heard a sound. Lord i’m amazed by you, how you love me.”

i was telling allison about this the next morning. she said it reminded her of a scripture verse from the old testament book of zephaniah (i’m not one that can usually recall verses from obscure parts of the bible off the top of my head, but my wife is, which is why i married her…). ” zephaniah 3:17:   “The Lord your God is with you. He is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing.”

He will take great delight in you. He will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing.

as i enjoyed that late-night dance with my son, i realized that even in our most unaware moments (which can be most of the time), we are immersed in the depths of God’s love. it’s a love that rejoices over us in dancing, that delights in us, that quiets us. it’s a love that sings over us. it’s nothing that we’ve done—our role in this picture is that of an unaware, helpless infant content upon the shoulder of a father. as in the case with my son, the joy and pride i feel for him is simply because he is mine.

a peek into easter festivities at the wagon wheel, which included Lucy’s first egg hunt and Gus reigning victorious in the annual Egg Nicking Contest, despite the fact that he’s three months old.

happy easter.

["Lucy & Lil Bro" from bradherndon on Vimeo.]

she’s getting the hang of it, don’t ya think?

i did something today i don’t usually do.

i went to church.

sure, i spend most sundays at church, but not like this.

i didn’t wake up at 5 am to a piercing alarm clock like i usually do. i woke up at 7 to my daughter stirring in the other  room.

i didn’t spend my morning coordinating teams of people, processes, songs and equipment. i spent my morning coordinating diapers, outfits, breakfasts and car seats.

i didn’t pull my barely defrosted car into an empty church parking lot while it was still dark. i drove with my family in traffic. in fact, we made it out of the house 2 hours later than we planned. thank goodness for multiple services.

i didn’t scarf down a prewrapped muffin and bottle of water—my typical sunday breakfast. i ate a hearty meal at home. and then at church i hit up the cafe for a big fatty frozen mocha that (shamefully) got most of my attention during the first couple songs of the worship service…and it was awesome.

i didn’t spend my morning onstage or in a tech booth. i spent my morning seated in the back of the room being led into worship by the heartfelt people in front who i could tell, really believed the things they were saying and singing.

my mind wasn’t racing all morning thinking about all the things i try to plan for and control in a worship service, like the next song, the next transition, the greeting teams or the room temperature. i was watching all the things you can’t plan for or control that really make the experience special. like when a woman in a wheelchair came in late and a family gave up their chairs to make space for her and her husband. and when a young mother needed to nurse her baby, and a couple in the crowded newborn area offered to give up their seats for her. and when the keyboardist in the band stopped playing in order to raise her hands in surrender to something bigger than herself. all reminding me that church isn’t about ourselves.

i didn’t sit through the sermon with half my brain distracted by what could’ve gone better so far. i sat next to my wife, followed along in my Bible during an excellent message that focused on changing the world, and i took notes. good notes.

i wasn’t one of the last few people to leave the church. i got to pick up my daughter from her kids room and walk with her out to our car.

usually i’m at church. this morning i went to church. i left more grateful than ever for the people, the leadership, and the heart of our church—to be a church without walls, to be a church that cares deeply for one another, that is focused on God’s Word, to be a church that doesn’t exist for itself.

i love being at church each sunday, but it’ll be that much more special now because of how i got to come today.

…the likes of which you’ve never seen. ain’t no getting between us. i feel sorry for the guy who tries.

she’s being a great big sis — definitely makin’ her mama and i proud!

just started a new book and came across this quote, which stuck out given this week’s events in the herndon house.

“A human baby is the strangest and most wonderful creature this world can offer. No other mammal emerges so helpless from the womb, utterly unable to cope with the opportunity and adversity of nature. Yet no other creature holds such limitless possibility.”

Culture Making - Andy Crouch

two of my nephews wanted to help us come up with a name for their next new cousin. so tonight at dinner, they came up with their favorite three, which i thought i’d share. (they wanted us to be sure we knew that these are first names and middle names):

1. commander cody herndon
2. neville longbottom herndon
2. cletus harry herndon

obviously, some real winners here. guess you’ll have to wait until january to hear the result…

any votes?

guess what happens when it’s daddy’s turn to do dinner?

and then for bathtime, lucy wanted to send her new (well, almost new — t minus 3.5 months) baby brother a present.

(btw, it took a few tries. she didn’t have a complete alphabet to work with)

but the REAL craziness of the day was earlier when allison called me at work and told me to rush home because i got an EMERGENCY telegram. i’d never gotten a telegram before.

right from the senator himself. he even signed it.

that was monday. what will tuesday bring?

]]> http://bradherndon.wordpress.com/2008/10/06/when-mommas-away/feed/ 1 bradherndon http://bradherndon.wordpress.com/2008/09/02/seriously-you-can-see-that/ http://bradherndon.wordpress.com/2008/09/02/seriously-you-can-see-that/#comments Wed, 03 Sep 2008 04:00:47 +0000 bradherndon http://bradherndon.wordpress.com/?p=152 ]]>

allison and i went to the women-doctor today for her 19 week pregnancy checkup.
it was time to know once and for all.
so the doc put allison’s belly on the little b/w tv screen.
and the doc saw a little “something.”

…i’m going to buy a t-ball bat tomorrow for the little slugger.

(thanks to all our family and friends who’ve been so happy for us, and prayed for health and good things along the way. we’re so grateful for you guys.)

it’s official, she’s moved up from being a sea turtle to being a seahorse. that’s enough to make any father proud. first this. pretty soon she’ll be getting college acceptance letters.