yes, i am from america-land
so allison and i just got back from a celebratory trip to the foreign land of mexico. there will certainly be a number of posts on both of our blogs regarding the events that happened in and around that trip. in the meantime, however, is a short list that i composed entitled, “How To Give Away That You are An American.” i’ll confess that during our trip, i was guilty of one (wait, no) TWO of these things…but i assure you, just two of them.
HOW TO GIVE AWAY THAT YOU ARE AN AMERICAN
1. walk around the airport in hot pink crocs that have flowers on them.
2. act really surprised and annoyed when the poolside waiter tells you that they don’t have any Sprite Zero. then have your wife back you up and have a conversation with her in front of said waiter about how unusual it is that there’s no Sprite Zero. then make a plea for any variety of Sprite (of which the waiter has already made known there is none of).
3. wear a baseball hat.
4. when you get there, walk out of the airport with an open beer in one hand and the rest of the 6 pack in the other, and then ask your wife where the kids are.
5. be a male in a swimsuit that covers at least half your thigh.
6. talk loudly all the time.
7. impress yourself with how much spanish vocab you still remember from high school.
8. get really, really excited about the amount of duty-free cigarettes, alcohol and jewelry you can purchase before exiting the country.
9. crazy headgear of all varieties, such as (but not limited to) visors and large straw-hats, usually involving some combination of flourescent colors.
like i said, we were guilty of some of this, but just some! more reflections to come about our time away from america-land.
I think you committed numbers 5 and 7. At least they were the two least offensive.
hmmm, well maybe i did 3 of these things—i definitely impressed Pablo with some of my old spanish. you missed one—i thought it was the most obvious one.
Oh yes…the ever-present baseball hat. Good job Gringo.